I told Jude he was blind & other parenting gems

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We’re in San Francisco today to escape the blazing hot temps of Oklahoma City. Babypants Archer is staying behind and while we will miss him we also won’t. Because toddlers=crazy.

Otherwise we’re doing our best to enjoy these last few days of summer despite the heat. Simon gave me a new bike for our anniversary and after Archer goes to bed, Jude and I take off to cruise around the neighborhood. This week we went on a few adventures to the local ghetto 7-11 as well as the (equally ghetto) Braum’s that’s outside of our neighborhood.

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As we approach the end of the summer, I’m also working on reviewing what worked for us and what didn’t as a means of helping Future Me next summer. Because I want/need to be kind to Future Me, don’t you think?


Not scheduling enough for J to do at the end of the summer.

Taking the baby on the slide at the pool. BIG MISTAKE. All he wants to do now is go down the slide & that, my friends, is exhausting. Because it means I also have to haul it up 2 flights of stairs to go down the dadgum slide. Remember, Future Me – don’t set a precedent you don’t want to repeat.

Encouraging Jude to read. I failed miserably at this, to my eternal frustration.


Having a babysitter to help us out. She was a godsend. I absolutely loved her and my kids loved her. WIN WIN all the way around.

Remembering not to overschedule. But that being said, spread out those camps for Jude more at the end of the summer than at the beginning.

Girlfriends and kids coming to the lake to hang out.

Implementing a chore chart for Jude so he knows exactly what to do each day & mounting it to the fridge.

Now, that being said, Future Me, I’m still struggling to figure out how to get the kid to do a thorough job. For example, one of Jude’s jobs is what I entitled “Poop Patrol.” This is when Nickels craps it up somewhere in the house. I basically refuse to accept any responsibility for this and make Jude handle it. Because its’ his dog, after all.

So the dumb precious Chihuahua pooped like a maniac up in Jude’s room and so I sent him to take care of it. I stuck my head in the door later in the day only to discover that he did not, in fact, pick up all the poop. I MEAN HOW HARD IS THIS.   So I was upstairs and  all deep sighing and muttering under my breath about “IS HE BLIND?” and  I yelled downstairs for Jude to getonuphererightnowandcleanitup.

As J comes down the hall,  I said seriously and contemplatively, “You know Jude. I’m really concerned that maybe you’ve got some blindness going on.”

Jude: ? “What?”

Me: “Yup, I’m wondering if I should call the eye doctor because it was pretty obvious that the poop was right there in front of your nose. Maybe we should get a good eye exam and see how much blindness you’ve got going on.”

Jude: ? ((speechless))

Me: It really concerns me, this inability to see the poop right in front of your face.

I then went on my merry mother way. And then miraculously he did a good job of cleaning up the offending poo. ?????

Ten minutes later he finds me in Archer’s room folding laundry and then he starts sobbing: “I! Am! Not! Blind!!!”

Me: ?

I’m not wholly convinced he isn’t partially blind and occasionally deaf. But hey, what kid isn’t?


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